Som en katt ligger jag och spinner under filten

Nej ni, det här känns som en perfekt latdag. Det är söndag och jag kom ur sängen tidigare än vanligt men ligger nu här igen under filten för att det är så jäkla mysigt!

Har en joggingtur/promenad till Gränby inplanerad då jag måste handla lite bordsmargarin, ägg och sallad till dagens 5:2-middag som kommer bli en kycklingsallad. Jag hade föredragit tonfisk men älsklingen tål varken doften eller smaken så det får bli kyckling ikväll.

Känner mig rastlös i kroppen nu, vill inte ligga stilla och kan inte koncentrera mig på att se på en serie eller läsa en bok så jag försöker bara smälta klart frukosten innan jag studsar iväg.

Blev för övrigt påmind av Staffans mamma att jag inte skrivit så mycket om påsken då vi hade en släktträff hemma i Sollentuna med våra föräldrar, farmor, faster, kusinen och alla djur. Så det måste jag göra snart 🙂

Mary Lambert – Body Love

Värt att enbart läsa texten, så jävla bra skriven!

I Know girls who are trying to fit into the social norm
Like squeezing into last year’s prom dress
I know girls who are low rise, mac eye shadow, and binge drinking
I know girls that wonder if they’re disaster and sexy enough to fit in
I know girls who are fleeing bombs from the mosques of their skin
Playing Russian roulette with death; it’s never easy to accept that our bodies are fallible and flawed
But when do we draw the line?
When the knife hits the skin?
Isn’t it the same thing as purging
Because we’re so obsessed with death
Some women just have more guts than others

The funny thing is women like us don’t shoot
We swallow pills, still wanting to be beautiful at the morgue
Still proceeding to put on make-up
Still hoping that the mortician finds us fuckable and attractive
We might as well be buried with our shoes and handbags and scarves, girls
We flirt with death every time we etch a new tally mark into our skin
I know how to split my wrists to reveal a battlefield too
But the time has come for us to reclaim our bodies

Our bodies deserve more than to be war-torn and collateral
Offering this fuckdom as a pathetic means to say,
”I only know how to exist when I am wanted.”

Girls like us are hardly ever wanted, you know
We’re used up and we’re sad and drunk and
Perpetually waiting by the phone for someone to pick up and tell us that we did good
Well, you did good.

I know I am because I said, ”I am.”
My body is home

Try this
Take your hands over your bumpy love body naked
And remember the first time you touched someone
With the sole purpose of learning all of them
Touched them because the light was pretty on them
And the dust in the sunlight danced the way your heart did
Touch yourself with a purpose
Your body is the most beautiful royal
Fathers and uncles are not claiming your knife anymore
Are not your razor, no
Put the sharpness back
Lay your hands flat and feel the surface of scarred skin
I once touched a tree with charred limbs
The stump was still breathing
But the tops were just ashy remains
I wonder what it’s like to come back from that because
Because sometimes I feel forest fires erupting from my wrists
And the smoke signals sent out are the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen

Love your body the way your mother loved your baby feet
And brother arm wrapping shoulders, and remember
This is important

You are worth more than who you fuck
You are worth more than a waistline
You are worth more than beer bottles displayed like drunken artifacts.
You are worth more than any naked body could proclaim in the shadows,
More than a man’s whim or your father’s mistake
You are no less valuable as a size 16 than a size 4
You are no less valuable as a 32a than a 36c
Your sexiness is defined by concentric circles within your wood
It is wisdom
You are a goddamn tree stump with leaves sprouting out
Reborn